Choosing a reading or poem for a funeral is an important way to honor the life and memory of a loved one. The right words can bring comfort, celebrate their unique qualities, and offer solace to those grieving. However, with so many options available, the process can feel overwhelming. Here’s a guide to help you choose the perfect reading or poem for a funeral.
1. Reflect on Your Loved One’s Personality and Beliefs
Consider what made your loved one unique. Were they deeply spiritual, a lover of literature, or someone who enjoyed humor and light-hearted moments? Their personality and beliefs can help guide your choice.
- For a spiritual individual: Passages from sacred texts or hymns can offer comfort and align with their faith.
- For a nature lover: Poems celebrating the beauty of the natural world, such as those by Mary Oliver, may resonate.
- For someone with a sense of humor: A lighter poem or witty reading can bring smiles and remind everyone of their joyful spirit.
2. Match the Tone of the Service
The tone of the funeral service plays a significant role in your selection. A traditional service may suit a classic reading like Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep by Mary Elizabeth Frye, while a more informal celebration of life might welcome something unconventional or even contemporary.
3. Consider Your Audience
Think about the people attending the service. Are they close family members, friends, or a mix of generations? A universal reading or poem can resonate with a broader audience. However, if the service is intimate, you might opt for a more personal or specific choice that reflects shared memories.
4. Draw Inspiration from Their Life
A reading or poem can reflect your loved one’s passions, values, or favorite things. For example:
- A poem about the sea for someone who loved sailing.
- A piece about kindness and generosity for someone who always put others first.
- A humorous anecdote or story for someone who loved to laugh.
5. Popular Readings and Poems for Funerals
Here are some timeless and meaningful options to consider:
Spiritual and Religious Readings
- Psalm 23: The Lord is My Shepherd
- Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 (For Everything, There is a Season)
- The Serenity Prayer
Classic Poems
- Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep by Mary Elizabeth Frye
- Crossing the Bar by Alfred Lord Tennyson
- Funeral Blues by W.H. Auden
Contemporary Poems and Readings
- Gone From My Sight by Henry Van Dyke
- You’ve Just Walked On Ahead of Me by Joyce Grenfell
- The Dash by Linda Ellis
Personal and Light-Hearted Options
- An excerpt from a favorite book, such as Winnie the Pooh by A.A. Milne.
- Miss Me But Let Me Go by Christina Rossetti.
- A letter written from the heart by a family member or friend.
6. Ask for Input
If you’re unsure, ask other close family members or friends for their thoughts. They may have ideas or suggestions based on conversations they had with your loved one. Collaborating can also help you feel more confident in your choice.
7. Read It Aloud
Once you’ve shortlisted a few options, read them aloud. This helps you gauge the emotional impact and flow of the words. Some readings may feel more poignant when spoken, while others might not evoke the feeling you’re aiming for.
Read more about Funerals and Memorials
8. Trust Your Instincts
Ultimately, the best reading or poem is the one that feels right to you. Trust your instincts and choose something that speaks to your heart and honors the memory of your loved one.
9. Work with the Celebrant
If you’re using a funeral celebrant, they can help guide you through the selection process. Celebrants often have a library of readings and poems to suggest and can help personalise the ceremony to suit your needs.
Final Thoughts
Selecting the perfect reading or poem for a funeral is a meaningful way to celebrate your loved one’s life and provide comfort to those in mourning. By reflecting on their personality, passions, and values, and considering the tone of the service, you can choose words that truly honor their memory.
Would you like help choosing a list of readings to a specific theme or tone?